The word-less...

...between me and YOU...
Even if this was all we achieved...
But yet still,i dare to reach out for more.

*When I am dead*

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The Quiet...

In between here....and here,is unspoken pain,the late night ponderings of what in heaven have i done,am i doing...as we crest from short highs to much longer valley lows...

In between here...and here,are the untold stories inbetween...being stranded at 3am in another town far from 'home',the doctor's appointments for worry induced sickness,the curses and the sighs, which make no sense in the end because we still pick ourselves up in the morn and better get back to it. (Ironu o san gbese is what the yorubas say,i.e postulations and ponderings do not pay the bills.)

In between here...and here is where i was yesterday and where i am today, and even though it makes no rational sense comparing for decisions already made,i still do earnestly hope that this all makes sense. You know how the hebrews slaves used to wonder that, maybe Isreal/captivity really wasn't that bad when you think about it here in this hot desert.

In between here...and here,is a brief quiet, a sort of momentary pause,before we get back to the grind. You know what really really smarts about the whole thing is,you just cannot do crap about it,except to just keep moving,one step after the other,keep walking...even though this note is hardly adequate to communicate...

...But he knows the way that I take...Job 23:10,right???Just tell me it'll be fine,and i'll make it through another couple of weeks.

The Quiet....

*Sigh*
The results ahead,
The Job,
The Bills,
The white folks pissing me off,
The family stress,
The worries,
The fears,
The worthlessness,
The nothingness,
.....I don't even have the strength the lament.....

You know somedays you just tire of strength to even "hope".
But it will work out, won't it...somehow....???

The thing about a man is,you just cannot let them see how you are toottering under the weigth of it all.

And the thing about this man is, nonetheless, you still gotta take it all, and keep "fixing it". You know,bullshit happens,and they bring it to you to "fix it" and make it right..and even when you are a literal mess, you still...gotta do what you have to do...somehow.

Oh,my baby gets back tomorrow. Slim,black,supple skin,i've missed her die, can't wait to get my hands all over her locked up in the cozyness of flat 86,just me and her for hours,exploring every crevice of her wanton body...oh Toshiba T135,come back home.

Unworded....

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