Wednesday, June 24, 2020

T.Notes#52: Somewhere in between Prose and Subtlety

My most honest prayers
Are not the ones i ramble in desperation.
Instead it is in these carefully crafted words,
Soulful truths
Nested inbetween prose and subtlety
I hope God reads my blog.

I have been trying to organise this page,
This life...
To determine a singular purpose
A contribution of sorts to humanity
What is your blog about? I dunno.
Untidy memoirs of a beautiful mind
From a deeply flawed man
Who could tell.

Once on a lazy breezy wednesday
I vividly remembered being groped as a child
By an older female neighbour
At first it was uncomfortable
That is as far as most men will tell.
I like my toast slightly burnt
With a drizzle of cheese.

I try to refrain from obscenities when i read the bible.
So instead i try to speak in tongues.
Curse words is what happens
After language has failed to articulate the depth of our emotions
The harvest is past,
The summer is ended,
And we are not yet saved.

You were over there,
I was over here.
Beautifully creative minds
betrayed by these bodies.
Unattended desires
Buried beneath white cotton sheets.
Like a fleeting daydream,
We was here.

Somedays I want to take a long break
From myself, and the consequences of this incessantly wondering mind.
Last night i walked with a slouch
Then a barely audible whisper suggested,
Don't you dare give up!
Hold your head up!

I guess what i am trying to say is
I want to pray tonight,
I ought to pray tonight.
But everytime i begin to,
I see myself.
I know myself.
And this is why the gospel is beautiful.

3 comments:

  1. I love this!
    I loved so many lines ...I think my favorite was "Untidy memoirs of a beautiful mind"..
    You have a beautiful way with words.

    You see the funny thing about writing/sharing...some lines in here stood out to me like answers to some questions I had been chewing on.

    Blessings.


    Tamie.

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    Replies
    1. Too many kind words! That commemt made my day! Thanks Tamie. It is certainly a beautiful thing when someone else finds personal meanining via your own expressions. Often proves that we are afterall all just humans doing our best to make the best of similar life journeys.
      Wish you every good thing.
      Stick around.
      T.Notes

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  2. Blessings........
    mmmmmm.....
    I think we are lead to be believe through well intentioned governing tongues that we have one purpose and one way of attaining, understanding and fulling such purpose and expressing ourselves in the world. What I have learnt thus far is this......

    Perpetrators comes in any gender, class, culture, shape and size and speak in many tongues, some spouting eloquently philosophical dribble designed to distract the eyes of knowing.

    We have more than one purpose in life and should not allow those with one great purpose to diminish our many purposes that creates the whole PURPOSE.

    We should not allow our errs, occasional poor decision making be the covenant that dictates our whole being to the point of Self-cannibalism.

    As human beings we must learn and teach ourselves to love our whole being, who we are in the current moment as we are always in evolution, who we were by forgiving ourselves our mistakes and lack of knowing. Who we intend ourselves to be as we learn from our own mistakes, the mistakes of others we were privileged to witness as it make act as a warning or who have shared with us their own debacles so that we may gain wisdom of where to go, when, why and for what specific reason.

    It is paramount that we learn how to forgive ourselves our humanness, to have compassion and empathy for ourselves and and not dwell on what could have been, should have been if this or that was aligned. To that i apply the old saying in my country "if shit was sugar, farmers would not have planted cane."

    Much of life is about learning thus its wise to become an avid student. Those things we miss, we fail to learn whether it be because we were distracted, inattentive or willfully obtuse as we will face as a consequence the repetition of those lessons until we learn. The learning is especially essential for there will come a time when you will be called upon to be the Teacher.

    With love my sistah of the root. I see you and you are enough.
    Peace and blessings.
    Rhapsody.

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